Waiting on the World to Change

This is an awesome song by John Mayer. It is so awesome in fact, that no less than Stevie Wonder says he wishes he'd written it! S is lucky enough to have a copy on his IPOD and I was listening to it yesterday b/c I can frequently be found driving S's car, Charlie Murphy, since S has to take the "good" car Blue Lou on his long job-hunting drives. Anyway, we had a meeting with our lawyer yesterday and this is an appropriate song for our current milieu. Especially the lyrics about how we don't have the means to rise above and beat [corruption] and how the fight ain't fair. S basically has decided we're done with this custody battle. At this point it's been over 2 years and almost $30,000 and we can't move on with our lives and now he just wants us to cut our losses. I did not agree 100% but it's really all up to S. He always told me that as long as he did everything in his power then whatever the resolution was he would live with it. I guess he's decided he's reached that point. However, in talking to our lawyer yesterday, I got the feeling of, who knows how far this could still go? That's b/c we are still going to have to go through a formal mediation process. This is where S and the whore sit down (and no one else besides them and the lawyers get to actively participate--in other words, me and dickhead have no say) and try to agree on certain things. For example, S is going to demand that he be put on the baby's birth certificate and she be given our last name. (The baby, unbelievably, has the whore's maiden name as a last name--the name the whore doesn't even use b/c she kept her married name from her 1st husband!!! So yes, the baby has a fucked-up last name that, besides being Third-world, matches NO ONE. Further evidence that the whore is absolutely borderline retarded. I'm sorry. That is an insult to those who have mental retardation. They are worlds brighter and more sophisticated than the whore.) The whore, in return, may demand $1,000 a month in child support. Then negotiations begin when necessary with the mediator mediating everything and the lawyers all having their say as well.

Now, since this is a beastly, mongoloid, diseased, sociopathic whore we're dealing with, even mediation with lawyers and everyone may not work. Our lawyer says if the whore refuses to meet S in the middle on any of his demands or negotiate, then we are still going to have to go to trial, supposedly in July. So we're definitely looking at another $10,000 in lawyer's fees at least if it comes to that. I can't even think about that at this point so I'm not even going to try.

When all is said and done, in another 5 or so more years the baby will be able to legally decide where she wants to live full-time. S is planning on her wanting to live with us if it comes to that point. Or even before, if it comes to that point. And we have loads of evidence that we are going to share with the baby when she's old enough. Photos of her brown, rotten teeth thanks to the whore's neglect. 22 recorded messages of a drunken dickhead threatening S over the phone. That filthy CPS report where the baby was coached into saying horrible lies about us. Oh yeah! Revenge is a dish best served cold. And who knows, maybe dickhead will beat the whore to death or maybe one of her old johns or pimps will come out of the woodworks and hunt her down and take her out, Robert Blake-style. Dare to dream.

So that's that for now. Moving on. These past few days have been... I don't even have the words for them. I have been living on the road in my own damn town. I was out at a Senior Health Expo last Friday. And we picked up the baby for our weekend, but then I was out all day on Saturday at a local medical society expo. Sunday was my one glorious day. It was so warm outside and sunny and beautiful, and we went to church, lunch, and then swimming! Sunday night S took the baby back and I went grocery shopping and it was just a perfect summer evening. I had to take a minute outside and just soak it in for a moment.

Monday I was out at an exhibit at a conference at the Galleria mall, Houston's world-famous shoppingasm. Yesterday I had a dentist appointment, and boy, am I in trouble. I have to go see a PERIODONTIST. This is the 2nd opinion I've gotten on the matter so I guess there's no denying it. My gums have been bleeding on and off most of the year but I was convinced it was stress-related, b/c I floss almost every day! Then amazingly, no bleeding around the time we went on vacation and none since then. My dentist is all, "You're at that age, and I would've sent you to a periodontist 2 years ago." Really? Crap.

Today I gave a presentation with a group panel back at the conference and now I'm sitting in my office trying to unpack from last Friday and all the other days in between. There's reports to write, outreach forms to fill out, receipts to find (b/c since I was on the road so much, you better believe I used my company credit card to eat good, boy howdy!!!) and besides all that, there's other work that came in while I was gone that I need to get to.

Poor S has been sick for most of the past week. First we thought it was allergies. Then he got an attack of his chronic stomach flu. Then he got a sore throat. And he was pissy besides, so Monday night he went over to Mudflap's house to watch wrestling b/c sometimes it's just best not to be around him! Want to have a long, fruitful marriage? Get away from each other when necessary! Also give your money to marriage counselors instead of divorce lawyers! It works, today we are back to being nice and loving each other. Last night he was over at one of the police agencies going through some more interview process, so I got out my bottle of Reisling that was 3/4 full, drank another 2/4 (b/c it's gotta last) and watched The Best, Funniest, Trashiest Movie Of All Time, Showgirls, and had the best time with myself.