Worthless!

Yep, I'm pretty much almost worthless these days at work. People that I need to get answers from on some projects are out of the office themselves for the holidays, so what's the point? Oh well, I'm technically here and not touching my vacation hours although it sure feels like vacation regardless. I can't relate to the holiday-celebrators, though. It just feels like everything is in limbo. When Mudflap and I were out in my district on Xmas Eve we heard that there were only going to be 2 units out on Xmas Day!!! What, there are no Jew cops or Muslim cops anywhere?!?

I was on the radio last week and won some tickets to the science museum, yay! Them shits are expensive too, yo. I think S and I will take the baby on Sunday to check out the Butterfly Center and the Imax. But I doubt they'll be interested in this exhibit. Anyone else want to see it? Let me know, the exhibit's here until April!

I had a really fun time visiting with my long-lost friend G. who was in town last Saturday. He bought me too many beers though and on Sunday, I believe I had some kind of attack or allergic reaction. I had only drunk 3 1/2 beers but I don't drink beer, or much else, anymore. S and I went running and after I ran/walked 5 laps I started itching and felt like my hives were coming back, but instead I just itched and got real weak and dizzy and nauseated and had to be carried to the car! Weird!!! Lesson learned: don't drink over 2 Shiner Bocks anymore. I'm too out of (drinking) shape.

Anyway, G. is the same as ever although the "Outlaw" tattoo he got on his wrist the same night I got my badge tattooed on my arm is starting to bleed colors a little bit. I was mad b/c I paid for that tattoo! My friend Frank always jokes that G. needs to get tattooed on the other wrist "Inlaw." Speaking of Frank, I ran into him as well on Saturday night. And a bunch of other long-lost gentlemen friends of mine, too! It was like some kind of reunion. G. was being a little maudlin though, reminiscing about our old, drunken, carefree days. I must say though, I miss those days too. Over the years we shared several ridiculously fun Guadalupe River trips and Austin City Limits Music Fest trips. There was even one river trip that consisted of only me, G., and a 14-yr old boy. I ended up having to drive G.'s truck all the way back to Houston b/c they were both so drunk. But damn, was it a blast!

TGIF, though. S took the day off from work to watch the baby and run errands and I'm here at Job #1 being almost worthless. We've got a long family weekend ahead of us, which'll be great. I have advised S to go ahead and put in his notice at his work and probably next Wednesday will be his last day. I want him to concentrate on the police academy! I have to admit I can't wait to help him study. I saved all my notes from my academy, flash cards, cheat sheets, etc. And it'll be a great refresher for me as well. There's a lot of damn laws to know!

Is Anybody Out There?

Blogging is lonely business these days. Of my blog buddies, only Tito J. is posting. The holidays bore me, in the sense that people think it's some kind of special time or something when it really just feels like any other day to me. The other good thing about the holidays, besides me having some time to loaf around and do what I want, is that traffic is pretty light.

Went out on patrol on Sunday and Monday, both days with Deputy Mudflap. But I've just about had it with him, which is good b/c I won't be able to patrol again until the 2nd week of January. He keeps making fun of my deliberate, careful driving and I keep getting po'd at him b/c he drives so freakin' fast we pass our locations about 90% of the time and have to double back! Anyway, once again I prove to be about the best crime-repellant that no money can buy. We left the Mexican Flea Market area on Sunday at around 9pm. At 10:15pm a fatal shooting occured right where we always patrol. If we had left at 10pm the shooting would've occured at 11pm; if we'd left at 11pm it would've happened at midnight, and so on and so on. I am true crime repellant.

Picked up the baby today with the assistance of L., who accompanied me along with her little baby. The whore was all by herself at dropoff, ha ha. Then we went to lunch and made plans for Saturday as well. After dropping off L. the baby and I spent some time playing at McDonald's, then she came to work with me. S picked her up and now they are at the movies while I am at Job #2. Tonight she can open her presents. Unfortunately, we didn't have her last weekend like I thought we were supposed to b/c Christmas has different visitation rules. But now we have her until Jan. 2 and tomorrow she will come to work with me all day, including here to Job #2! She likes to do the online coloring pages so I can sit her down on one my 32 computers here and she can go to town while I sit here, like the Queen of England, and be their professional librarian since they still have not provided me with the necessary tools I need to order and catalog the books yet. Hey, they need a professional librarian and I need $$$. A win-win situation if I ever saw one!

The Best Thing About The Holidays

...is really only that I have some time off to do what I want to do, such as sleeping in a little bit! And eating, although that needs to stop NOW. I've put on 5 lbs. (ok, maybe 7) in the past few weeks and can no longer squeeze into my size 2 jeans. I had to break down and buy some size 6's the other day! S says he likes the new junk in the trunk but he wants me to start running with him so we can lift it and tone it. Last weekend I did, in fact, go running with him and Mano, but I prefer to walk a lap, run a lap, walk a lap, run. And bounce my tennis ball while walking. I'm into bouncy balls these days. Anyone who needs any present ideas for me, there it is! Bouncy balls, of all sizes! I'm working on my eye-hand coordination.

So as far as all the other stuff goes, I don't buy into the propaganda. I avoid shopping, stores, malls, as much as is humanly possible during the holidays. I refuse to rush around like everyone else is doing. Having a child, we do put up a little tree and a few lights here and there but that's it as far as decorations go. I'll be going on patrol with Mudflap on X-mas Eve, and I'm deliriously happy b/c the Sgt. says we can use one of the extra cars at the substation. This is as opposed to going to pick up our own Reserve vehicle, which is stored so fucking far away that by the time I reach it I'm always so over it I'd almost just rather go home at that point! So that's what the holidays mean to me: having some time to do what I want to do, when I want to do it.

We go pick up the baby in a little while, and unfortunately S has to work tomorrow to finish up the holiday rush, but we need the $ since he only has a couple more weeks of full-time employment so although he bitches I am grateful. The baby is just going to come along with me tomorrow to run errands. We may take her to look at X-mas lights in the tony neighborhoods in the evening. Tomorrow night my dear old pal G. will be in town (he sez) and so I will meet him at our old stompin' grounds to catch up and drink a beer together or two! Damn, how I miss him. He is one of the best friends anyone could ever ask for and he's the kind of friend that is always there for you, no questions asked. Now he lives in the Hill Country and I just miss him like hell. One of these days I'll post some of my favorite stories involving our experiences together.

Lazy days at work here, that's for sure. I took an extra long lunch and even got to have it with S since he was working nearby! Next week we will have the baby from Dec. 26-Jan. 2 so she'll be here at work with me for at least one of the days, which'll be fun.

Sold! American!

"Damn!", is all I gotta say. I was procrastinating on sending out our Xmas cards b/c I've just got too much other stuff on my mind. I had a pic of me, DH, and the baby that I wanted to use but it was on digital. I figured I'd have to schlep myself down to Walgreens or CVS and plug into that machine they have there and size it and print it, blah blah blah! And who has time for that?!? Anyway, I was looking at Walgreens.com for coupons, as I do, and it said you can upload your digital pics on the website and pick up the prints later at the store!!! Holy balls! I did exactly that and I am not kidding, within the HOUR I had an email from Walgreens saying the pics were ALREADY ready for pickup at the store by our house. At .19 freakin' cents a print. What a country!!!!!!!! I coulda done this days and days ago!

It's feeling a little lonely out here in blog-land. Some of my favorite bloggers have the nerve to have taken off for the holidays. Bums. Meanwhile, some of us are stuck here and don't get to go anywhere! And I'm PO'd at the state again. I was going to use this slow holiday time to knock out another class online for my Intermediate Peace Officer certificate and the website has been down since November 27. What a crock! 2 classes down, 7 to go. This is going to take me at least another year.

So I spent some more time thinking about my career options. I even called my li'l bro to ask him if I could practice dragging him 35 feet since he's the closest person I know to weighing $1.50. I called some of the federal law enforcement agencies' recruiting offices. But honestly, I don't think it's mean to be for right now. I don't hate Job #1. It's rewarding in its own way. I got 2 free meals yesterday. I can blog on company time. And I don't want to have to go work a 2p-10p shift, where I will never see DH and the baby. Additionally, when I was taking that class at the academy last week, it really struck me as to how ignorant a lot of street cops are. I mean, the majority of them simply don't read at all, ever. Even the instructor, as much respect as I have for him and he actually does read books, I had to gently correct him when he got homicidal mothers Susan Smith and Darlie Router mixed up. Also I gently corrected him when he called the book A Child Called It incorrectly as A Boy Called It. Lord knows I've seen that book enough in the public library, plus I've read it! He also advised us to read the book on JonBenet Ramsey, Perfect Murder, Perfect Town. Uh, I read that book years ago. Anyway, see what I mean? I genuinely don't want to be thrust into an anti-intellectual environment which, unfortunately, it seems that most street cops inhabit.

So, for right now, I'll continue being a librarian/cop instead of a cop/librarian. And have too much fun doing so, on my own schedule on my own terms.

Supercop on Santa's Lap

So no, we didn't get our visitation with the baby this past weekend. The whore is being the asshole evil whore that she is. Like I stated previously, more ammunition for our court case--like we need any more. Just when we think this is a slam-dunk in our favor, the retard whore screws herself even more. It's all over in February for her.

Since I had the whole weekend free, I went on patrol on Saturday with my old pal, the hilariously fun deputy that calls me "Coffy Brown." He says he can retire in 4 months if he wants to, but he's having too much fun. Can you imagine a job where you have "too much fun"? Jeez. I am always a little scandalized when I ride with him, but it's always in good fun! We spent a lot of time goofing off, including an hour at Hooters. Also we went to this really huge, really cool store called "Outdoor World" where I took a picture sitting on Santa's lap. Hey, he patted his knee so I sat down on it! Then he gave me a candy cane.

Later we put this dumbass punk kid in jail for POM (Poss. of Marijuana). It was hilarious how we caught him. I don't even want to say in print in the blog. If you're dying of curiosity, you will have to ask me about it in person or send me an email. But it was fun tearing his apartment apart and looking high and low for the stash! Turd.

While at Hooters the other deputies gave me an idea. They said that with my credentials and education I should consider getting a Law Enforcement job with the feds. They say it's great benefits, but at my age if I'm going to do it I need to do it now. So today I spent some time researching the idea--FBI, DEA, ATF, ICE, Marshals, Border Patrol. I have to admit, I'm a little reluctant due to 2 factors: leaving Texas, which I most assuredly will have to do for awhile for training and/or a job, and passing the PT test. I CANNOT climb fences and I CANNOT run 2 miles. Period. I am too old for this shit. I admit it, I don't want it bad enough. I'm not starving in the streets, I'm not enduring intolerable conditions at Job #1, I'm just a little pissed off on some days.

Still, I am considering some other things. I had to go in to Job #1 this a.m. and had to deal with more bullshit. It sure would be nice to have a job that is actually "too much fun."

Back...and Bigger Than Ever

Yikes. The slacks are starting to feel too tight again! Anyone else having this problem? Raise your hand! For starters I was at the sheriff's academy Monday-Wednesday and there is nothing to eat around there but fast food or Mexican Taquerias. Now, we did have an hour+ for lunch but I spent Tuesday and Wednesday lunchtime at the nearby public library, checking my email and stuff. Also researching some of the material I learned about at the class, "Investigating Child Abuse." I am just too curious! Was Lewis Carroll really a pedophile? And I must find this book, Zero at the Bone, about this nut! Also some freaky movies we talked about. A lot of this shit is hard to find, and I'm a librarian with access to WorldCat and everything. We also looked at some child pornography magazines and I certainly don't need to do that ever again, thank you very much. But it was a highly interesting, intensely disturbing class and now I'm a certified Child Abuse Investigator. Or something like that.

As usual, I got the scenarios right. You get called to a house with a single mom and 4 kids, all under the age of 6. The little 4-yr old girl has a burned, blistered hand. The mom claims the little girl burned it in the bathtub. You run the hot water for awhile and test it with your thermometer (because all cops carry thermometers, right?!?) and the water only goes up to 138 degrees. Can you arrest mom? HELL YES, I said! Mom lied to me! That injury happening that way is not possible! And some of my classmates argued with me, saying they couldn't prove Mom did it. I said she had to do it, b/c no one else in the house could've done it and no kid is going to keep their hand under hot water that long enough for it to be blistered. I said I'm taking in Mom for Injury To A Child, which in Texas even if it's an accident it's still a crime, and I'm calling CPS to come take the other kids before Mom hurts them too. And I was right.

So besides all the academy fun, I was busy with a couple of holiday parties this week. Tuesday night Auntie R. came and partied with me. Last night was Job #1's holiday party. The snacks and treats and delicious party food just keep on comin'. I ate a shitload of boiled shrimp and even partook in the rum punch last night! Then I took home 4 humongous petit fors for S.

The bummers of the week are that we did not have visitation with the baby last weekend after all b/c the whore "forgot" it was our weekend. And we are still waiting today to hear from our atty. if we get this weekend as a makeup. The whore is not returning my text messages to tell us if we do or not. So--more ammunition for our court case. A lot of pain now for a lot of relief later, after we win.

Also, now my car, Blue Lou, is in the shop as of yesterday. So there's even more grief and loss of $ to deal with. I am having to bum rides from S and my coworker who lives nearby. I keep waking up in the morning with more and more gray hairs, which no, I don't appreciate! And I knew I'd be returning to a FUBAR mess at Job #1 yesterday as well, but I didn't imagine the extent to which it's ascended. And it's not over yet. I was planning on taking an entire day off on Monday to go make some $ at Job #2 but now it appears I might have to make an appearance here instead. Bullshit!!!

Here's the promised pic's from 2 weekends ago. Better late than never.

Me and baby petting sharks and stingrays. Ok, only I petted them. Baby couldn't reach and kept chickening out when I tried to help her. Baby wearing wings and tiara supplied by Ma!

There's a tiny crawlspace underneath the stingray/shark tank for chirrens. Naturally, I had to check it out. The entrance is like only 2 feet high but I couldn't resist! Later I petted that shark at top left.

The baby and me. She is pissed b/c I thought of making that cool tiger pose before she could think of it. After this she kicked me out of the picture so she could do it by herself!

Baby on the ferris wheel.
She forced me to go on this stomach-churning falling ride with her like 6 or 7 times. She said it made her tummy feel "good." I'm a big, bad, tough cop and I could barely handle it. But she's too little to ride it by herself, so that's what moms are for!

Adela Has Left the Building

Whoo, what a week! I have been scheduled to within an inch of my life. And next week is more of the same. Monday-Wednesday from the unGodly hour of 8am-5pm I'll be at the sheriff's Academy in Humble TX, attending a 3-day class on Investigating Child Abuse. Monday night I have a X-mas party/shopping event to attend. Tuesday night I have the High-spanic Health Coalition's party. Wednesday night I'll attempt to make some $ at Job #2. Then I'll be back to Job #1 on Thursday to deal with lots of general fallout and cleaning up of some bullshit messes that I know for a fact will happen while I'm gone.

The reason I'm actually able to blog a post right now is b/c S was sent to work in north Houston today, so he and Mano are going to pick up the baby. Praise the Lawd! It's absolutely heavenly not to have to rush to meet him and then rush up there to pick her up. All I have to do now is go home and clean the house and make dinner. Tonight S is going to see Dane Cook in concert, and I am glad he is getting a chance to do something fun for himself. (My nice thing that I get to do for myself is the Academy class next week. To each their own.)

Tomorrow bright and early a representative from the life insurance folks are coming to the house to take S's blood and health history b/c I am finally getting a policy on him, just as I took one out on myself last year for him. I wonder if he'll be able to successfully fast all night tonight? Then we are most likely going to see "The Nutcracker" at the theater company located across the parking lot from the back of our house, comp. tix courtesy of M.'s friend, a very nice guy I met at one of my gigs with Jimmy! To end our Saturday, we've got a very nice party to go to at J. Fi's ultra-wealthy friends' home, and that will be endless good eatin' and drinkin'!

S and I need some bright spots these days. We are both getting into the shit at work lately and are having to deal with totally unreasonable, delusional assholes. You know, the kind of jerkoffs that demand that you sweep and mop the floor but refuse to give you the broom and bucket. He even got into trouble at work today due to my showing up last night to help him assemble some bicycles. That's unfortunate, b/c I don't mind helping him out; we get to spend time together and I kind of enjoy the mindless tasks S has assigned me of taking the bikes out of the boxes and cutting the zip ties off and removing the protective cardboard and filling the tires with air.

And me, well I made some kind of un-politically correct faux pas at work via email by making a comment about Mexicans and their, shall we say, inability to be panicked by deadlines. (My exact quote was they are "not big on urgency.") So I ran this past S and 2 close friends who all agreed the folks I offended were indeed being overly sensitive! So fuck 'em.

Ok, this non-urgent Mexican-American is outta here!

Stevie Wonder!

Stevie, Stevie, Stevie. What can I say? I don't even know! Here's a decent writeup. Basically: it was beautiful, Stevie Wonder has the exact same incredible voice he had 30 years ago, he played for almost 3 hours straight, he looked like he was having the time of his life, it was great, it was cool, it was magic. Of course, he didn't do "Tuesday Heartbreak" but that's ok, it really is. You shoulda been there!

Then I had a really great dream last night. I'm not ever one for discussing my dreams b/c I did all that dream interpretation stuff when I was a teenager and I'm completely over it now. But it's all S's fault for making me watch all this wrestling b/c I am totally in love with 2 wrestlers these days: Randy Orton and Chris Jericho. I am not even kidding, it's even starting to bother S a little, heh heh. (That's what he gets, I have had to put up with his lusting after the wrestling divas and his having the occasional Playboy lying around the house! [Ok, I read it too!])

Should I be bothered by a little scar tissue? I gave blood today at Job #2 and they said the vein I always use has a little scar tissue. I'm a little grossed out now. Then how the hell are we supposed to donate once a quarter like they want us to?!?

I am lousy with Christmas invitations and parties coming up. One this Saturday at J.Fi's rich friends' house. Then parties next Monday night, Tuesday night (actually I have 2 parties that night but can only go to one!), and Thursday night. Then a dinner party next Friday night that is being thrown by my father, of all people. So many social engagements, so little time!

"The Suspense Is Killing Me...

...I hope it'll last!" That's probably my favorite line from the old Willie Wonka movie, the one with Gene Wilder. Anyway, tonight is Stevie Wonder!!! Man, oh man. I can't contain myself. If he does the incredibly emotional funky amazing song "Tuesday Heartbreak"--which he won't--I can die and go to heaven. He better not waste our time with "I Just Called To Say I Love You." I always like the lesser-known songs of the chart-toppers and the hit-makers, so I always seem to luck out at concerts. Still! It will be worth it just to be there. When he was on American Idol I wanted to cry I was so jealous of those damn kids!!! (Ok, maybe I did cry a little bit.) Concert review tomorrow!

Meanwhile, for the Weekend in Review, it was busy and jam-packed with activity, but what else is new? The big highlight for me was petting a very tame stingray in the water at the Aquarium. I never touched one before and it was incredibly soft and felt very velvety! I had to pet it over and over again. Later I came face to face with a humongous white tiger. Pic's to follow soon, I promise!

Mudflap Thinks He is So Damn Funny

He has humiliated me and C.!!!

What Kind of Reader am I?

What Kind of Reader Are You? Your Result: Dedicated Reader You are always trying to find the time to get back to your book. You are convinced that the world would be a much better place if only everyone read more.
Obsessive-Compulsive Bookworm
Literate Good Citizen
Book Snob
Fad Reader
Non-Reader
What Kind of Reader Are You? Create Your Own Quiz

Ok, now back to reading...

This is My New Favorite Blog

...of the day!
It's a little full of self-annoyance, (even a touch of self-hatred?) but it's very funny regardless! And there's no denying it's full of lots of little truths. I would say I'm finding myself agreeing with about 75% of it. But fortunately I don't suffer from any self-annoyance or hatred b/c I generally don't find myself having very much in common with most other librarians I know anyway. This is just a job I do, man, and the best part about it is the books and having an office with a heater under my desk!

Makin' Bikes

So last night found me at work at the local Target with S, helping him assemble bicycles. I was wearing ridiculously high heels and pantyhose and my feet were killing me, but I did find the whole process quite interesting and I have a whole new respect for S and the hard work he does to make money for his family. Of course, I always find other people's jobs fascinating, and I love to read books like Gig and Stud Terkel's Working and the like. S is really fast at assembling bikes too and he pretty much had to teach himself most of this stuff. I don't think I could do it.

The reason I was at work with him is b/c he had to come pick me up from work. The reason he had to come pick me up was b/c I was driving his car to Job #2 yesterday morning when all of a sudden, on the highway, I heard this hissing noise and saw smoke start to come out from under the engine and realized the car was majorly overheating. Yes--more car troubles. This in addition to the flat tire I got in that same car this past weekend. So now the car is sitting at our trusted mechanic's with a donut on and hopefully will be ready tomorrow. At which time we then get to worry about tires and how we're going to get some. Well, J. says her mechanic friend can get us some used tires. That's what it's going to have to be!!!

When it rains, it pours. Our lawyer said that on top of everything else, we are not going to trial next week. We knew it was a long shot but we're still pissed b/c now we have to wait until February Fucking the 4th to go to trial, so 2 more months of this bullshit. By then the whore will have given birth to her demon spawn that may or may not be dickhead's fetus, knowing what a whore she is, but I'm sure he doesn't care anyway, and I can't imagine what new stall tactic they will be able to come up with in February but I guess we'll have to wait and see.

So at the very least, I am still going to take 2 vacation days next week that were supposed to be for trial but now they are going to be for making some $ at Job #2. It's the least I can do.

Well, we did go see the new Coen Bros. movie on Sunday night. I liked it but I think Fargo is still their best movie. I loved the Javier Bardem psychotic killer character, though. He was terrifying. S said he reminded him a lot of his father! ["Did your father ever kill a man?" I eagerly asked S. "No, but he once threw a guy through a plate glass window", was the answer.] I know for a fact that I would make a great killer/assassin/hitman, whatever you want to call it. I've always believed that some people just plain and simple need killin'. S says he also wanted to be a Ninja for the longest time! Ooooh, don't worry, gentle blog readers! Hopefully you all know that we're not the sociopathic kind of killers, but rather the dishing out justice (heh) kind! But seriously, I never understand cops who suffer emotionally after killing someone. The way I figure, it's just one less turd breathing my air. In fact, when the sheriff's dept. investigator first came out to my home before I started the academy to interview me about why I wanted to be a cop, and he asked me how I would feel if I had to kill someone, I hoped I didn't answer too suspiciously quickly when I responded that I would have no problem with it.

OK, That's It!

P. from VA called last night to tell me how incredibly "f**king good" the new Coen Bros. movie is. He is the 2nd person this week to tell me. So I am going to try to convince S to take me to see it tonight after we drop off the baby. Seeing this movie would wrap up a great holiday weekend, even if I currently am here at work again. S'ok, it just frees me up some comp hours to earn some mo' $ at Job #2 tomorrow and again later on in the week.

We had a lot of fun last night. The boxing matches were excellent--I'd say we got our money's worth. And now that L. is dating her new man, who is an older, kind of conservative, quiet gentleman from South Africa, she behaves a lot better so S can tolerate her and everyone can get along. At least they did last night!

Busy couple of days coming up. Tomorrow I'll put in a 1/2 day at Job #2 before coming to finish the day at Job #1. Then I've got my monthly sheriff's meeting, the last one of the year since we don't meet in December. Then bright and early on Tuesday we will head to court to see if we are going to go to trial next week or not. Who knows, but only God himself will fix that problem for us if He deems that next week is finally the time to do so.

When It's Rainy Outside and You're Stuck At Work

...especially on a holiday weekend :-( then fool around in your blog and take blog quizzes! See below:

You Are Miami

Sexy and beautiful, you turn heads wherever you go. A little spicy and a little exotic, you're fully aware of your unique appeal. Totally high energy, you keep the party going early into the morning. Famous Miami residents: Anna Kournikova, OJ Simpson, Enrique Iglesias

What American City Are You?

Now I don't know how they can discern that from my answering only 5 questions, but whatever. I guess that's one reason S loves me so much, since Miami is his favorite place on earth.

Right now it is just after 10am on a dark, rainy Saturday morning and it is really quiet in here. I don't think the heat or the blower is turned on but the air is totally still and my typing is making me self-conscious, it feels like it's so loud. Still, there's no one around me at the moment although a couple of crazed students have needed assistance at this early hour!

We had a lovely Thanksgiving, enjoyed with the family and even my father. I ate 1 1/2 plates and damn was it good. Then we veged on the couch for about 5 hours and watched this car racing show, Pinks. S couldn't move his eyes from the screen (he's a former street car racer, including the use of nitrous; I do NOT approve!) but indeed, it was somewhat interesting to watch. The baby played with her cousins and my Uncle, who has a magical ability with cats and kids.

Yesterday S had to go up to Mano's house to work on S's car, an all-day project. So the baby and I met up with my girlfriend S. and her 2 daughters for a day of fun at the Chirren's Museum! And fun it was. I never get to see S. hardly ever b/c we are both so busy with work and family. But she is going to assist me with a library card project at my Job #2 since she is a branch manager at the local public library so hopefully we'll be on each other's radar more often now. At the museum I took a look at us, with 2 small girls, a tiny baby in a big-ass stroller, and a pile of jackets, purses, snacks, coffee, wipes, etc., and I said, "Can you believe we're two old married ladies with kids?!?!" Seriously, I remember when we were just a couple of hip young librarians with not very much to worry about.

Tonight we are going to L.'s house so we can watch the boxing PPV and the baby can play with L.'s troublesome son. Then tomorrow I have to be back here at Job #1 to work again! But at least Sunday is the short shift, from 1-6, or in my case, 1-ish to 5:45-ish!

Is He Making Fun of Me?

Here's me and C. outside the downtown jail, in front of the Wall of Honor or whatever it's called. This lists all the deputies that have died in the course of duty. Whenever Mudflap takes a picture of me I always have to pose and I think C. was deliberately stealing my pose and mocking me!

So today I am mostly worthless. There's not many people here at work b/c they had the foresight to get their vacation requests in well ahead of me before I could even think about it. They pull this shit on me every year. This will be the 6th year in a row that I will be found here working the days around Thanksgiving and Christmas while everyone else is gone. So here's how I deal with it: do what I did today, i.e., come in late, take a long lunch, and leave early. And loaf.

Today Ma is watching the baby, who I'm sure is being spoiled rotten by her and my Popo as we speak. Last night R. came with me to pick up the baby and, proving herself to be one of the best friends I have ever known, put herself between me and dickhead, thereby preventing me from ripping out his jugular with my teeth before spitting it in the whore's face. Violence prevention is so important around the holidays!

Tomorrow my future is sausage balls. I shall make my usual batches of sausage balls to take to my wonderful Aunt P.'s house, where we go every year for T-giving. Friday we have a couple of options for fun which we are playing by ear for now.

Right now I am grooving in the office b/c if you go to Taj Mahal's website you can listen to his music all day long, it seems! What a blessing. Sometimes I really miss playing music. Apparently I've been fired from Jimmy's gig. For one, my schedule is too crazy and two, I'm probably too expensive for him. As much as I enjoyed his music, I do prefer to play for a more rockin' ensemble. My musical nostalgia is gonna really hit hard in a couple of weeks when we go see STEVIE WONDER in concert!!!!!!!!! Man, I had to get tickets for that. No choice. I had to do some creative things with the budget in order to afford it--WORTH IT! I may faint from the amazement of him, but at least I will be there!!!!!!!!!

Ok, back to work: finish reading my book, Model Patient by Karen Duffy; bouncing my rubber ball with light-up electronics inside; drinking my new favorite beverage, Diet Wild Red Soda; and maybe I'll attack some of this stack of professional reading while I'm at it. In the immortal words of my love Rick Danko at The Last Waltz, "Happy Thanksgiving!"

Saturday Bloody Saturday

It was just a weird day full of death and injury! For starters, at the zoo we had the fortune to see the green tree pythons get fed their lunch of 1 white mouse each. I actually ran to the reptile house ahead of dawdling S and the baby so I wouldn't miss it. And I picked up the baby and pressed her up against the glass so she could get a good look. Hey, it's science! The poor mice. And I hate mice!

Later, as I parked my car in the parking lot of the new Job #2, as I got out I saw a dead squirrel right near me, his head bloodied. Eww! At first I was worried I had hit him, but his paw seemed to already be in rigor mortis.

Finally, I ended the night by going out on a quick 5-hour patrol so I could finish up my hours for the month. There were all kinds of knuckleheads getting into car accidents all day long due to the rain, but the very last call of the night that we got was a man that got hit by a car. When we pulled up he was lying in the road, face down in a puddle of blood. A concerned citizen was holding a towel to the poor guy's head, staunching the flow and doing a commendable job, I must say! The victim was awake and alert though in a good amount of pain, and the lady that hit him was a homeless ex-con with no driver's license and no insurance on the car she was driving, which was her daughter's. I think it was just one of those unavoidable accidents due to the rain and the guy who made the bad choice to walk in the middle of the road. The lady was shaken up and was quite remorseful, so we wrote her 2 tickets and told her not to drive the car--its windshield was all busted anyway.

Man, I am looking forward to having a couple of days off this week, although I do have to work here at Job #1 on Sat. AND Sun., bummer. But we pick up the baby again tomorrow and have her all the way through next Sunday, so that'll be fun. Unfortunately, we had a little incident last night when we dropped her off b/c dickhead had the gall to speak to me and ask a retarded question that if he and the whore knew how to read, they would find the answer in the court order. But since she's third-world trash and he's redneck white trash they don't know how to read and they're too lazy and stupid to contact their doddering old fool of an attorney, so they think they can waste more of my and S's time and I refuse to let them. So since I ignored dickhead he actually had the balls to knock on my car! I shot him the finger through the window and told S to drive off, and so dickhead knocked again, harder. This time I rolled down the window and gave him the finger again in his face along with a "Fuck you!" Then S drove away.

S says I need to be more zen about any confrontations we have with dickhead and the whore. But my temper always gets the best of me, unfortunately. This is just how I deal with it. I'm sure this anger is not doing anything good for me, especially physiologically, but obviously I'm nowhere near to being ready to accept zen-ness.

More of the Same

For example, here was my schedule today:

8:37 am-Teach 2-hour class to Evidence-Based Practice Scholars. (It was supposed to be at 8:30, but this is me we're talking about.)

11:20 am-Leave for Hispanic Health Coalition general membership meeting, which was from noon-1:15pm.

1:16 pm-Drive down to deep Southwest Houston to do my monthly site visit on one of my electronic touch-screen health kiosks (how I hate those things).

2:30 pm-ish-Stop by "Just Brakes" to see if they could squeeze me in since I found out yesterday while getting my oil changed that my 2 front brake pads need to be replaced. No such luck. I will now have to drive around like this until Monday. Oh well!

3pm-ish-Stop by Chick-Fil-A to get my mom a present (in my family, we do food as presents) since due to my ridiculous schedule I keep having to put off going to visit her and my grandfather, who is now home from the hospital, yay!

4pm-Meeting here at work WHILE being the librarian on call for the reference desk.

And now it's 5:54 pm and I am stuck here for another 6 minutes, after which time I will go downstairs on my way out to see if there's anything interesting in the staff lounge refrigerator since they had their Thanksgiving luncheon today while I was gone, then I'm heading down south to FINALLY see my mom and grandfather.

Tomorrow and this entire weekend: more of the same. I am not kidding, tomorrow and Saturday are completely booked for me already, and as always. It reminds me of yet another of my favorite movies, The Paper, and how Michael Keaton was Totally Booked Solid for an entire day. Check it out if you haven't, and see what my life is like!

Whirlwind of Activity

There's a scene in the movie Goodfellas where Ray Liotta is running around, trying to do everything from cooking pasta sauce to picking up his brother at the hospital to running drugs and he has to be here at that time and there at this time and it's a mad rush. That's how my past few days have been! I am hitting the ground running with just enough extra time to sleep and eat and that's it. I even patrolled 12 hours on Sunday and I'm currently blogging from the new Job #2. And the rest of this week is no different, although I am going to make it home tomorrow night in time to watch the new season of Project Runway!

There's a scene in All That Jazz where the Bob Fosse character, Joe Gideon, says, "I hate show business" and his girlfriend says, "But Joe, you love show business!" He says, "That's right. I'll go either way."

So I, too, must love all this work. I guess!

Bad Voter

I didn't get to vote yesterday b/c I had totally forgotten to update my voter registration card with my new address. Dammit! And apparently the voters that did bother to turn out voted the State of Texas into more debt, debt, debt and to totally disregard the U.S. Constitution on another issue. I've had it with this state, country, government!!! I guess I could've driven all the way to my former precinct location in rush hour traffic to vote but it wouldn't have made a damn bit of difference anyway. I hate to think that way, but in this particular election it was true.

My 91-year old grandfather is in the hospital as of yesterday b/c he is a stubborn old man and I'm pissed off about that, too. But, as with the voters, what can you do?

Anyway, it was wonderful to not have to rush off to the old Job #2 last night. I can't even say how great it was to leisurely head on home, chill out at the house, do laundry, make a sandwich, watch GP (Guilty Pleasure) tv with S. And I worked 6 hours on Monday at the new Job #2 so I "double-dipped", earning 2 salaries in 1 day at the same time. (I have comp time off from Job #1 that made that possible.) That is the additional perk of the new Job #2 that I didn't even realize! As an added bonus, I also met Mudflap and S for lunch since we were all near each other!

Last week and weekend were so incredibly busy and this week and weekend prove to be more of the same. I can't even get into it right now, so I won't.

Halloween Horror Week

What a miserable fucking week. And it's only Tuesday!!! Basically, we are depressed and disgusted b/c yesterday at our pre-trial conference, the whore and her asshole doddering old fool lawyer got the jury trial that was scheduled for next week POSTPONED AGAIN. Our lawyer says that every delay that could possibly happen in a case seems to have happened in ours. Our lawyer protested vehemently, but it was no use. The judge granted the continuance. The amicus told the judge that when this gets reset again, short of someone dying then we need to move forward. We got put on the docket for jury trial as a backup case on Dec. 3. Although our lawyer says the lawyer on that case usually settles her cases and there's a good chance that we will go forward at that time with our trial, I'm sure the whore will come up with some other excuse to postpone. I don't know how much more obvious it can be to anyone with half a brain that she is deliberately stalling. Why would that be? Because she is going to lose, and she knows it!!! But in the meantime she is also sending me and S to the poorhouse and in the meantime she also has custody of our child. We are up to $24,000+ spent on this case and we haven't even got to trial yet.

Poor S was literally at a loss for words yesterday when I called and told him (I'd gone to the courthouse alone so he could go to work and make $--I get paid time off, he doesn't). He said they are breaking him. I've never heard him say that before. I've seen him have panic attacks, bleeding ulcers, insomnia and nightmares, but I never heard him before come out and say that he doesn't know if he can take it anymore, and it worried me. I begged Mudflap to call him and talk to him, but Mudflap couldn't get S to answer his phone. Later I asked S if he wanted me to skip my monthly sheriff's meeting last night and come home, but he said it was ok if I went.

I didn't rant and rave as much this time as I did the last time they got this postponed. I did cry a little yesterday and this a.m. and had some insomnia last night. But these fuckers don't know who they're dealing with. If they think they're going to make me--US--give up, oh man, are they sorely mistaken. Everyone knows I damn well finish what I start, and I WIN. What did piss me off is the whore was hiding out until the amicus left, then she and the lying old bag came out of hiding and when I saw the whore, she didn't look at me (she never looks at me) but started smiling, knowing I was looking at her. She is 6 months pregnant and it shows. If I were her, I'd be careful. Karma is a bitch. More than the whore could ever be.

If there's any good news at all in this horrible saga, it's that I didn't pay the amicus his money yesterday (although I did have to pay my lawyer another $5,000) so at least the payments will be spread out a little bit more. I went to work at the new Job #2 for a little while yesterday after court so double-earned some $ before I went to Job #1. I love Job #2's convenience. It is right down the road from home and Job #1.

I didn't have much appetite again yesterday or today, although I did go out to eat at our usual place after the meeting with Mudflap and C. They made me laugh, so that's good. We are making plans to spend NY's together again. C. wants to spend it down in his neck of the woods, which is waaaay down south. He says if we don't want to drive home after midnight with all the crazies then we can crash at his lovely home, which would be nice! So that's probably what we'll do.

So I wasn't going to participate in Job #1's H'ween festivities tomorrow, but the crazy library director's very nice secretary called me today and said that she heard I always dress up, and that she was going to, so was I? I told her I couldn't get it together this year. I was feeling a little sad about it, seeing as how I always, always celebrate Halloween in full force. But she begged, and even offered to buy me lunch if I would dress up! So I said I'd think about it. And actually, I think that thanks to her prodding and encouragement, I can scrape together a last-minute something for tomorrow. It really just wouldn't be me to not celebrate H'ween. And no matter how much you've lost or how much you've been through, you've always gotta be you!!!

Last night at Job #2. I got some nice little going away gifts. I will miss this place though I admit on the drive down here I was thanking the Lord I won't have to make this drive on Tuesday nights anymore. S texted me that he missed me and I texted back this is my last night, yay!

Cupcakes to the Rescue

Sometimes you just need a cupcake. Especially one with orange frosting and a spider ring on top of it.

Last night I was thinking how I wish we could afford to go grocery shopping at Kroger!!! (Damn, I'm frugal.) But that's really just b/c their bakery dept. is far superior to the HEB's at which I always grocery shop (if you are Hispanic then you must pronounce HEB, "El Cheeby"). I was jonesing for some fresh baked cookies or something. But I went to El Cheeby anyway, only to find that their power was out and they were all hanging out in the parking lot to warn us customers to vamoose! Onto Kroger! I bought Halloween cupcakes on sale and a bakery box of my fave cookie of all time, the White Chocolate Macadamia Nut. Went home and ate one of each. And was happy!

I've had such a bad attitude at Job #1 all year long I had already decided not to participate in their Halloween festivities here, when I always have in previous years. But now they've announced a H'ween staff party w/prizes. Oh, here's my competitive streak rearing its highly competitive head. In past years I've been: Annie Oakley, GoGo from Kill Bill, a fairy, a bullfighter, and last year I was the Mexican wrestler Rey Mysterio. So now I better figure out something to wear and I've got less than a week to do it in.

Rough Few Days

The past few days have just been damn weary. My marriage was tested big-time, and then, as if a sign from God, last night I offered to help my friend at Job #2 b/c she is waaaaay behind on shelving since they haven't yet hired a replacement for the other shelver that left, and I stumbled across the book Surrendering to Marriage and it had a lot of good stuff in there that I needed to read. I liked the part that said if any married person is at all honest, they will say that marriage can, at times, be hell.

Anyway, it was kind of interesting to observe how my brain totally shut down on Sunday. It was nice to just give myself over to helplessness--b/c when you're at your absolute extreme limits of thought and action and can do no more, it's nice to finally have the freedom to DO NO MORE. There is a great peace in just not giving a shit about anything in the world anymore. Now, you don't want to spend too much time in that place for what I hope are obvious reasons, but on Sunday I was there and I was, for lack of a better word, "happy" to be hiding out there for awhile. Later, S and I made up. I knew we would, and that is one of the many reasons I married him. Meanwhile, my brain is still slowly coming back into play. (It's hard to come back from that place.)

But besides all that, we had a great family weekend up to Sunday. On Sat. we took the baby to her final visit before trial with the amicus atty. and I feel like it went very well. (He told us the whore is pregnant again. Will she and dickhead actually give birth to the true antichrist? Fuckin' scary.) Then we went to the zoo for "Zoo Boo" and had a fun time there. I had decided to not be so hard on the baby anymore in terms of her behavior and to give her all the attention she wanted. I've been reading this extremely disturbing book that I cannot put down called The Working Poor: Invisible in America and it talks about the vicious cycle that is poverty and also the station of children in that cycle. I'm especially distressed by reading the kids' stories. I remember in 2004 having the misfortune of waiting for a bus in Anacostia, where some of these kids' stories take place. I was with P. in VA and I desperately wanted to go see my hero Frederick Douglass' house in Anacostia but we had to take a bus to get there since P.'s car was back at my hotel in DC. We waited in misery for about an hour. We were surrounded by a huge crowd of some of the ghettoiest blacks you can imagine. Pre-teen girls were loudly cussing and actually smoking a joint right in front of us. They acted like animals. I was so disgusted. Eventually P. and I gave up and went back to DC. Frederick Douglass must be rolling over in his grave.

But I digress. Anyway, a certain line from that book struck me. It said that these certain types of parents complain about their kids acting out, saying that they're just trying to get attention. Well, the books says, but children need attention. Whoa... I guess I'd forgotten that lately. I paid extra attention to the baby this weekend and played with her every time she asked (as opposed to taking breaks from her and burying my nose in my book) and she actually didn't need much scolding either. Funny how that works out.

Nice weather we're having here. Don't have to turn on the a/c at home which means saving money, yay! S and I tried to run on Monday night but had to settle for walking laps due to the rain and the wind. We were the only ones out at the park. I was in no mood to run anyway since my brain still wasn't working right. My appetite is slowly returning also, which is good. I told DH, if you ever see me NOT eating, you know that it is deadly serious. I only lose my appetite in the most dire of circumstances, and I'd lost it on Sunday-Tuesday.

All This Work

So yesterday at the New Job #2 was interesting and productive, I suppose. I taught myself how to copy-catalog books by stealing the info from the Lib. of Congress' Z39.50 webpage. Fortunately my predecessor had bookmarked that website and so I deduced what he had been using it for. Then it was just a matter of figuring out how to use the library's catalog software, this ghetto product that had several misspellings and typos all over its website and user manuals. But I ran through the tutorial and read the manual and figured it out. Hopefully I did it right--we'll soon see! This library is so tiny, basically the size of a small classroom. But tomorrow they're moving the books downstairs to the new space, which is about twice as large. I ordered them to KEEP THE BOOKS IN CALL # ORDER! I report back for duty next Monday evening. I hope it's not too scary after-hours, as that's the majority of the time I'll be there. It'll be a little lonely, I think. Pros and cons, pros and cons.

I've been mostly out of the office at Job #1 this week and Admin. is getting a little perturbed that this stupid kiosk project is not yet completed. They can kiss my ass b/c I simply have not been here lately in order to deal with it! I had to teach this a.m., go do a site visit on another stupid kiosk this afternoon, and tomorrow a.m. they've got me exhibiting at the local Guatemalan consulate. What do they expect?!?

Tonight is the HOA Board of Directors meeting at home. They are trying to fix some money and parking prob's. and a lot of us residents will be in attendance. I expect lots of screaming and table-pounding to occur!

Date With Myself

I have worked too much lately: Job #2 on Sat., Patrol on Sun. too late b/c of a stupid ticket I wrote that had an error on it; and yesterday I had to go do an exhibit at this horrible, dark, seedy nightclub of all places, for Latino AIDS awareness day from 2-4:30, then hustle up to the extreme opposite of town in rush-hour traffic AND the rain, to teach the Folk Remedies class one more time at 6pm. My throat had been hurting a little on Sunday and also a little last night. When I finished with the class I had to get back home--again at the extreme opposite end of town--and I was so tired I wanted to sleep at the wheel!

Ok, it didn't help that I was up until after 1am on Sunday night watching the Spike Lee documentary, but it was so good I couldn't look away! So last night, lying on the couch and eating a dinner of soup heated up by S, I decided I was going to bed early AND taking a sick day today in order to give my throat, body, and psyche a chance to heal. I slept about 10 hours last night and needed it! And this afternoon I decided to take myself out on a date and went to see Into The Wild, the new movie by Sean Penn based on a true story and a book that I've--naturally--read. Unfortunately I had to leave the movie early so I could make it to Job #2 on time! :-( It was longer than I thought it would be. Good thing I know how it ends, heh heh.

Tomorrow I'm taking the day off from Job #1 in order to put in a full day at the new Job #2. I had brunch with Tito J. on Sunday and he says I am going to have to do some cataloging there. Holy balls, I haven't done any cataloging, ever. Sure, I took 2 classes on the subject in library school but that was 13 freakin' years ago! Is there a website on the subject? Anyway, I'm looking forward to tomorrow. I wonder if I'll miss dealing with the hoi polloi library patrons? Tonight we had a seizure occur and everyone was freaking out except me. The teenage boy collapsed and the mom was screaming out and everyone was gathering around and I immediately and calmly announced, "It's ok, he's just having a seizure, he's going to be all right." We called 911 anyway and EMS came and dealt with it. We've been having a rash of incidents around here, from what they've told me. In separate incidents, 2 people broke bones outside just yesterday on the library's porch! I hope the city's prepared for lawsuits.

I'm reading about 5-6 books at a time right now. I'm trying to read as much as possible before I gotta turn them back in at Job #2. It's a wild adventure!

One Thing I Won't Miss About Job #2

Well, there's a few other things too, like attempting to get here at 8am on Saturdays and kicking out disrespectful, loud-mouthed teens, but the BIG one is how motherfucking cold it is in here, like, all of the time. My coworker and I are both sitting on our hands again. At lunch I went to BK and sat in the car and thawed out for the entire hour. And I'm wearing a jacket, jeans and cowboy boots (it's rodeo week here)!

I'll have to continue the Osler's 8 Lessons posts later. I had a really fun time last night with my other coworker from Job #2 and her b-day party at the Spotlight Karaoke! S and I both dressed up a little bit fancy and Mano met us there later. They had the big room reserved and there was so much food it was a feast. Also 2 cakes including one that looked just like a big microphone! (I took pic's, to be posted later as soon as my lazy ass gets around to it.) I told S we'd go for "one hour" b/c I had to work today. We ended up spending 3 hours there and not leaving until midnight, so today I'm tired but happy, having had a great time at the festivities and having 2 pieces of cake at home waiting for me since she insisted I take some home!

And yes, she's mad at me for leaving Job #2, but she also understands about the mo' money, mo' hours thing. But we found out something really funny, turns out she is very familiar with my dad's degenerate family, specifically his cousins that are all pot fiends and crackheads! She comes from the same barrio that they do. She told me that they deal drugs out of my grandmother's sister's house, which I am well aware of, and that she has tried to call the cops on them many times. Turds. I told her how I will always remember being a little kid and being at the 7-11 with one of my dad's cousins, and watching him try to pay for beer with a big pile of pocket change.

S and Mano are out running today; S is being so disciplined about his running lately, in preparation for going to the police academy in January. He has gone running almost every single night and I go with him when I can, which lately has not been much due to all my work obligations.

I can't wait to go home and lounge. I've got Spike Lee's documentary about Hurricane Katrina When The Levees Broke waiting for me at home, and Dr. Elizabeth Warren's riveting book The Two-Income Trap that I can't put down. I'm also listening to Chuck Norris' autobiography, Against All Odds on CD (S got that one for me from the library). So much information to absorb, so little time! I feel like I'm never going to get to it all. In heaven I'll have my very own non-fiction multimedia library! Tomorrow will be a busy day of meeting Tito J., who is back in Houston for yet another weekend, for brunch, then rushing home to meet Mudflap for another exciting day of dishing out police brutality at the Mexican Flea Market. Ha ha! Just kidding! Maybe.

8 Practical Lessons That Will Better Your Life, Pt. 1

I attended a wonderful lecture on Tuesday (and got free lunch, yay) on the great William Osler, one of the fathers of modern medicine, and 8 lessons from his life that we can all learn and use in order to be successful. It was nice to see that I myself already adhere or attempt to adhere to many of the lessons.

1. Find Mentors.
Osler had several other physicians whom he admired and who helped him out, gave him a job, gave him access to their private libraries, whatever. Whenever I've met someone I greatly admire--ALWAYS an extremely accomplished individual--I have allowed them to influence me greatly both in work and in life. I've pretty much handed over to them the controls to my tender young mind and psyche, shut up, listened, observed, and did what they said to do, no questions asked. These include my high school viola teacher, Ms. Meitz; my high school orchestra conductor, Mr. Lantz; my college viola professor, Dr. Papich; my college orchestra conductor, Dr. Brusilow; and my library school professors, Dr. Ana and Dr. Totten, to name the most notable and the ones most responsible for me being where I am today. (Some of these people I was a little terrified of too, which I'm sure helped.)

2. Find a Calling.
Osler was going to go into religious work initially but then medicine caught his eye. He was torn between the 2 but ultimately of course, chose medicine. I've been lucky enough to enjoy several callings. Art was the first, but music was the second and the most intense. I'm not sure I would consider library science a calling b/c I don't feel the passion for it that I feel for my other callings. For music I feel passion always at a 10 for example, but for librarianship it's never above say, an 8--and that's on the good days! The next and most recent calling is, of course, law enforcement, for which I have been tempted to forego librarianship completely many times. Still, all these things I believe that I truly excel at, so I consider them all callings.

3. Manage Time Well.
Osler always planned his days carefully, squeezing every minute he could out of them. I guess my attempt at this is that I do multi-task all the damn time and actually enjoy it. I get a kick out of doing 3-4 things at once at work, switching between them. Also, if you count reading books and magazines in the car at stop lights and in drive thru's managing time well then perhaps I'm great at this time management thing! Bottom line, I'm never bored and always have a shitload of reading to do, so my time is never truly wasted anywhere.

4. Be Positive.
Osler was an eternal optimist. My years in Mary Kay taught me the value of being positive b/c they simply don't allow you to be anything but! However, trying not to sound too much like Tony Robbins, I have seen with my own eyes the power of positive thinking. Even something as little as visualizing a parking space right up front, and it happens. For reals, it's almost voodoo-ish, try it! And of course, for the bigger things in life, religious faith has a lot to do with this too. But when I was younger and a heathen agnostic my version of this was that I succeeded b/c well, I was just better than you at it, and I knew it. I'm glad I've evolved beyond that to the truth, which is just like Mary Kay (or was it Zig Ziglar?) said, "If you can conceive it, and believe it, you can achieve it." It's hokey--but scarily true.

Part 2 and the remaining 4 lessons tomorrow. I'm off to a Hispanic Health Coalition Board Meeting.

I'm So Glad We Had This Time Together

I submitted my resignation letter to Job #2 a little while ago. The new Job #2, which I will be starting later this month, just gave me an offer I couldn't refuse. More money, more hours, flexible schedule, less than 6 miles from the house. The only thing I'm not getting is a damn company car! Yet, I do feel a little sad. My best friend here at Job #2 isn't even here right now so I can tell her (she's home sick). Dang, I'm gonna miss the books here! I LOVE being able to just pick an item off the shelf and go home with it to cuddle, no late fines to sully the relationship! But I'll have some good books at the new Job #2 to enjoy, I'm sure. The new Job #2 is at a business school library, and I get to do all the ordering ("collection development", in library-speak) and so I bet I can find some interesting business and money books to read!

Lord, have I had a busy past few days. Worked at the festival, providing security, for 2 nights. Had some fun with S and the baby. Saw some friends, ate some nice meals, got our cars back finally from the body shops! Oh man, the festival was fun and mostly mellow this year. S and the baby came with me on Saturday and ate dinner and the baby played on the kid rides in the kid section. I ate soooo much good food... Also for the first time in my law enforcement career I made somebody cry, and yes I feel bad about it in retrospect. But she shouldn't have disobeyed me! Cops HATE it when you don't do what we say, ok?!? This is how idiots get Tasered and shot. Cops are always, always, always erring on the side of our own safety. We are going to go home with the same amount of holes in our body that we started our shift with and if we don't know who the fuck you are and we have to take you out in order to do so, then that's the breaks, unfortunately. I don't know how much more I can stress this.

What happened was, I got assigned to work the "money hall." This is a long hallway leading to offices where the festival organizers keep all the cash. There is so much money back there that I don't even feel comfortable disclosing the amount here, so I will not. This is my 3rd year working the festival and in previous years when I've been assigned the money hall, I've been so bored all I do is doodle on scraps of paper. This year I came prepared with my book! (I held it on my lap under the table so no one could see I was reading although the Lt. caught me and said that was "smart" of me to bring some reading material [the incredible book and subsequent documentary, Maxed Out]. The money hall is usually slow, quiet, and boring though a highly essential duty.)

Anyway, the rule is, NO ONE goes down the money hall unless they have a black festival badge or a neon orange festival badge. Pretty simple, right? Let me repeat that: NO ONE, unless, BLACK BADGE, or NEON ORANGE. It's not fucking rocket science. I don't give a shit if you're Houston Mayor Bill White, you're not getting past me. So usually all the non-black/orange badgers are fine with me telling them they have to find other ways of getting to where they're trying to go, just not down this particular hallway. Well, I couldn't believe someone had the--I don't know what it was, ignorance? disrespect?--to ignore me. It was a Mexican woman custodian and she just waltzed past me like I wasn't there. I stopped her and asked for her badge. She said in broken English, "I'm working," and also told me in Spanish. I said what I'd already been telling everyone else, that she couldn't go down that hallway. She repeated that she was working and I repeated she still couldn't go down that hallway. She just turned and continued on and I jumped out of my chair, PISSED, and absolutely screamed at her. (Those of you who have seen me pissed and screaming know what a sight that is.) I screamed at her so loud the money people peeked out of their offices. Fortunately for her she finally turned and went out the other door, but glared at me as she left. Like I give a shit!

A minute later she appeared at the other end of the hallway, having found an alternate route in. That's ok, all that matters is she didn't get past me, so I did my job. Then she was talking to the head money lady and she was sobbing b/c of the mean bitchy cop that wouldn't let her past! Wah wah wah! So the head money lady came down the hallway to get my side of the story. I said that I had my orders (which were actually the orders from the money people themselves, right?) about the badge rules. She sighed and said that they have so many workers that if I had a question about anyone to just give her a call. Whatever. Later I told the Major himself about what happened and that I had made someone cry in the money hall. He said coldly, "So what?" I guess he's no stranger to making people cry!

Later that night I cried myself. I watched the movie Freedom Writers which I got from Netflix. When I got home after midnight S and the baby were both out like lights and I was still wired from working and having done the money drop to the night deposit box with shotguns and everything, so I watched the whole movie. At first I thought FW was just going to be another Stand and Deliver, Dangerous Minds, etc. And it is. But it has a different kind of twist! A very, very sweet, very touching one. Historic, even! I couldn't believe what those kids pulled off, and I had to research the true story for my own disbelieving eyes. Check it out if you haven't yet. (See, mean bitchy nazi cops have hearts too!)

The baby was pretty good this weekend, just a couple of minor infractions, for the most part easily remedied and corrected. One annoying thing she did on Sunday was cry 3 times! She rarely cries and I take special pride in her not being a damn crybaby like lots of other brats out there. But she must be in a new phase of trying this new bullshit stunt of crying when something tragic--to her--happens. For example, S accidentally returned one of the baby's own books to the church library along with the church's books. Waterworks! WTF?!?!? The 2nd time later that day that she cried over something bullshitty I knew this was some kind of new con of hers and I told S we did not need to be responding to it. The 3rd time she cried even later I was done and told her to knock it off. Now.

I had to take her back to the dentist yesterday b/c the composite resin he put on her decayed front tooth had apparently fallen off or been chipped off, or who knows. He said it's hard to get the composite to stick to the baby teeth. But he tried a new material and didn't even charge us for this visit. I texted the whore to let her know and told her dumb ass to try and keep the baby's teeth fixed this time, which she probably won't. Worthless whore. The baby was so good at the dentist afterwards we went to the Chirren's Museum and I let her run amok. She painted her own face--twice!

The day ended well with me going off to teach 1 entire person the Folk Remedies class at another local public library while R. went with S to drop off the baby. After that we all went for sushi, man oh man, at our long-lost favorite Osaka! I had leftovers today. Damn that's good stuff.

Intermediate Peace Officer Certificate

I've decided to go for my intermediate peace officer certificate. This is a huge undertaking. I will have to take 9 core classes, which include topics like Child Abuse, Crime Scene Search, Asset Forfeiture, Racial Profiling (no, not how to do it!), etc. This will take me at least a year, maybe more! It takes most officers many years to do it b/c you have to have either college hours associated with the certificate or years of service. Mudflap asks why I'm doing it, for the pay raise? Ha ha! Nah, I just like to achieve things, that's all. I'm your General Achiever!

Today I achieved a sore arm. I got my flu shot at the low, low price of $5. Job #2's administrative body was having a health fair for all the employees so even though I was just there last night I headed back today for the cheap flu shot. I also got animal crackers and a free pedometer and other giveaways for my trouble.

S says his car should be fixed and ready by Friday. I hope so!!! I am letting him continue to handle all this car repair/insurance crap b/c my face is still twitching though in lesser frequency. Tonight we go running with marathoner R. Ooh, my face just twitched thinking of it!!! Running, I hate you... but you are so good for me.

And a Fight Breaks Out

I had a bizarro teaching experience last night. For 3 Mondays this month I got suckered into teaching a class I've never taught before, "Folk Remedies: What Does the Science Say?" which is a class on Complementary and Alternative Medicine Therapies. It is not my class but rather a class belonging to the National Library of Medicine's Regional Medical Libraries. It's a long story on how I got "picked" to be the one to teach this class, but whatever, who cares, it's another thing I can add to my resume. (Plus, I'm sort of into this topic lately on a personal note, what with the aromatherapy and all so it's a little fun and interesting for me.)

So last night, tired as I was from the incredibly busy weekend I had, I had to truck on out to the extreme west side of town to teach this class at a local public library. I had noticed earlier that the library hadn't even advertised my class on their website so I wondered if anyone would even show up at all, and consequently didn't feel too bad that I arrived at 6:01 pm for the 6pm class, har. One lady was in attendance, but another lady showed up late. Maybe because there were only 2 of them they saw no problem with freely inserting their own discussion, multiple questions, and debate into my presentation. But when the fight between them almost broke out, that's when it got truly interesting! I had just gone over the top 8 dietary supplements and what they are used for when the 2nd lady loudly declared that dietary supplements and herbs have NO side effects, like medications do (!). The other lady responded heatedly--and correctly, duh--that that was absolutely not true. They both had raised voices and were interrupting each other. Me and the staff librarian in attendance were watching it like a tennis match. I was hoping he'd take over and make them behave, but then I remembered this was MY class so I interrupted them as diplomatically as possible and forged ahead. When I came to the evidence showing how many serious side effects some of these herbs and dietary supp.'s indeed have, the 2nd lady actually quieted down. Finally!

It reminded me of when The Band played at Jack Ruby's club in Dallas back in the 60's, the Skylight Lounge, and there were literally 4-5 people in attendance. And a fight broke out! WTF?

Man, was this past weekend a doozy. I worked all day Saturday at the Latino Book and Family Festival. This festival is aging, and not well. Attendance, exhibitors, and enthusiasm were all way down from previous years. It didn't help that I spent a lot of time hiding behind my booth on the phone, catching up with J. Fu and L. I never have time to talk on the phone anymore, so I had the opportunity and I grabbed it! Sat. night S and I went to eat at a local Mediterranean restaurant near the house--yum! Plus I got to use my coupon there before it expired.

Sunday was back at the festival but only for a couple of hours. Then I raced home and Mudflap came to pick me up for yet another fun day of patrol at the Mexican Flea Market. I had threatened Mudflap that we were only going to stay out until about 8-ish. But now that it's getting darker sooner I couldn't resist staying out a little bit after that b/c that's when all the idiots with their stupid vehicles with the stupid blue undercarriage lights come out to play! I was handing out tickets like candy. My favorite one was the pinhead who had no license, no insurance, and claimed he couldn't afford insurance but was driving an obscene Ford F-150 with tons of blue lights all over it. I should've towed his dumb ass, but wrote him 3 tickets instead and made his friend who had a license drive him home "right now!!!" Merry Christmas, jerky!

As I told S yesterday, the FlakeFest continues with this other p/t job that I recently interviewed for. Now we are playing phone tag with each other. The guy called me from his cell phone on Monday and left a message when I was gone for lunch. I used a strategy of waiting a few hours to call him back. But before I could do that he tried calling me again when I stepped out for a few minutes to make copies! So I called him right back--and he voicemailed me. D'oh! I left him a message but today he did not call me back, that I know of. But I've been gone most of the day, having left work early. Anyway, here tonight at Job #2 I got my annual evaluation. (I didn't even know they evaluated p/t employees, but whatever.) And my ratings were darn good and they also told me I was doing a "great" job. I even got an "Outstanding" rating on one category! For some strange reason, they even evaluated me as "always being on time" which is so not true on Saturdays, hee hee! Ah well, they know I'm a solid worker and an exceptional librarian, thank you very much.

The rest of this week is more of the same: work and then more work. I am working at the Greek Festival Thursday night and Saturday night, 4pm-midnight. It's a lot of hot, outside, sweaty work, but the (free) food definitely makes up for it! Plus it is fun to stand around and bullshit with my other deputy friends that I don't get to see very often. I am taking S and the baby with me on Saturday so she can play in the kids' playground section.

Lavender Etc.

The brown-bag workshop we attended (and I helped organize) yesterday was on Folk Medicine in the Latino and Asian cultures. Ya know... I think they're on to something. I learned about disease diagnosis via tongue appearance. (My tongue is red and slightly swollen, meaning--no shock here--I've got too much heat/anger.) I was reminded that Aromatherapy was pioneered by the Aztecs. I know S and I have just about had our fill of Western Medicine. I was at a community clinic a couple of weeks ago and I made that statement to the white male doctor who was there and he agreed with me. He said he's had more success curing Asthma by surgically releasing the 3rd rib down than any other treatment. He pressed on my 3rd rib and demonstrated how tight it felt. My colleague that was with me watched, amused and grinning--but I saw the doctor's point!

So today, my face still twitching, I took a long lunch and went to the Target to invest in some lavender-scented aromatherapy items. Lavender is supposed to be the very thing for stress! I got incense, room spray, hand lotion, and oils. I've recently developed a new stress-induced symptom, a painful neck, and I intend to make S rub my neck tonight with the oil while we light the incense. I've never had neck pain before so this is particularly making me unhappy.

I also got in some good girlfriend-therapy last night, as R. the angel took me out to eat at one of my favorite places! Before we knew it, we'd spent 2 hours at the joint, commiserating. I even got in some music therapy as there was a Dixieland Jazz Band comprised of geezers playing all night long, too! They played some of my favorites, including "I Know What it Means to Miss New Orleans."

I'm off Roy D. Mercer for my humor therapy and am on a Cheech and Chong CD now. All this aromatherapy investigation I've been doing made me think of J. and me in Australia, at a spa in the sort-of-outback, and we had to order from a menu of strange flavors of oils and herbs. We had a good time in our ignorance laughing at the "Ylang ylang" and pronouncing it in our best hillbilly accents, "Why lang, why lang!"

Eventually I might have to get into this acupuncture stuff. I believe S should try it for his back and stomach pains. What I DON'T want to have to do is go to my American Dr. and have him prescribe me a bunch of mood elevators and shit like that! Nope nope nope. Aromatherapy, humor therapy, music therapy, bibliotherapy, and cinematherapy first!

S did get a good deal on Seinfeld Season 8 last week, and so we have been watching that at night before we go to sleep. He also got me a long-stemmed red rose the other night which helps--I'm such a skirt sometimes!

Adela Throws a Fit

These past few days have not been filled with shining moments for me. Or by me. I pretty much cried for 2 days straight: on Sunday at church when S went down the aisle to the preacher so they could pray together; on Monday morning before I threw an absolute fit at the collision shop; and Monday afternoon after I got home from the collision shop.

I was just so pissed. I was pissed at S for changing the insurance claim so he could get his car involved and therefore, fixed. I was pissed that he was altering the story and therefore, potentially making me change my story, should I ever have to revisit it. Those poor people at the collision shop! They were trying to be so nice b/c they knew I was on the verge of blowing (although they had no idea why b/c S did not tell them what had really happened) and gave me a Dodge Neon to drive, "Blue, just like your car!" Then I went outside and threw my purse down on the ground and keys and everything, slammed car doors, yelling, crying, the whole works. I drove off in a furious puff of smoke, leaving S there to apologize for my behavior and figure out what he was going to do about his car. In the end he drove his car back home b/c I refused to allow him to leave his car at the same collision shop. I just knew we were going to be under suspicion of possible insurance fraud and I would lose my badge over this and so I was not about to have both cars left at the same location!!!

The other glitch of the day is that we had to get S in somewhere to see a doctor and his work was refusing to honor his injury as workman's comp related, even though it is. So since I'd already forced S to call his POS mom so she could pay for his part of the insurance deductible and other related costs, he asked her to also pay the $75 doctor's fee and she agreed. At least I got to call in sick for the day since spouses' illnesses/injuries can come out of your own sick leave at Job #1, which is a nice perk for us married types. I was very mentally disturbed myself as it was, so somehow, some way I needed to take a sick day!

Then, to top off the day, I had to go to my monthly sheriff's meeting. My Sgt. wanted me to go to the Hard Rock with him afterwards, and even offered to spot me since I told him I was broke. But I couldn't. I was too wiped out from the weekend and my eyes were too tired from crying. I know he wanted to talk b/c he's apparently going through some tough times too, but I hugged him (he's a sucker for me) and asked for a rain check. I had to get home and collapse.

At least this weekend the baby was well-behaved, though I really only got to see her on Sunday since she passed out early Saturday evening, not long after I got home from Job #2. We had an unpleasant experience picking her up on Friday though and also dropping her off b/c we had to deal with dickhead both times. Every time I see him I feel truly homicidal, so much so that I shake with hatred and anger. He had the nerve to try to talk to us, but S seems to think that dickhead knows I have a temper, so he talks to us to try to piss me off. So I just need to not show any response at all. The whore also texted us some absolute bullshit, to which we did not respond either.

No word back yet from the other job I applied for, so it's been 2 full business days that they've had to think over my offer. I don't even care anymore. If I have to stay here at Job #2 there are worse things that could happen. I would miss my friends here and the public library setting, although we have been incredibly busy tonight and I have had to speak Spanish at least a dozen times so far!!! But it's been good to be busy and get my mind off things. I am going out of my way above and beyond to help people b/c I figure if I feel so shitty right now, at least maybe I can help someone else and make them feel better. Normally when all these Spanish-speakers come in I internally roll my eyes at them for not having the gumption to learn English. But tonight this man came in with his son and they were making a flyer for their yardwork business. It was a sad little flyer and I insisted on fixing the spelling on their English words, and then I really got into it, doing fonts and spacings and even convinced him to add some little graphics. I spiced that thing up! I admire entrepreneurs, even if they do need to get with the program and learn some freakin' English.

I tried to cheer myself up last night by listening to Roy D. Mercer. It did work for a little while! But I won't be better until this facial twitch and the heavy sighing go away. I'm also tired of getting pulled over, which happened AGAIN tonight! The blue Dodge Neon has an expired sticker on it. I badged out, but I am going to complain to the collision shop anyway. Anyone else probably would've gotten a ticket and that is not cool!!!

Literary note: Am currently reading Lance Armstrong's It's Not About the Bike. This is b/c we watched You, Me and Dupree a couple of weekends ago. (If you don't know what I mean, watch the movie; it's not bad.) Armstrong is also a hothead, like me. It won him bike races galore. But his cancer fight also reminds me that things are truly not that bad, even if it doesn't seem like it.

Crash. SIGH.

So last night I and my formerly beautiful car, Blue Lou, got hit on the freeway. By whom? Oh, by my esteemed S. The guy in front of him was not paying attention to the traffic in front of him that had slowed to a stop. S, behind him and in the lane next to me, in order to avoid rear-ending the guy, swerved into my lane of traffic, crashed into me, and sent me momentarily into the next lane. THANK GOD I did not hit anyone. But I couldn't believe what had just happened, and yes, I was PISSED and yes, poor S felt my wrath and today is still feeling it. He claims it was not his fault but my retort is that S was driving so fast that of course he could not stop in time in order to avoid rear-ending the other guy. Of course I'm glad that no one was hurt, and the baby was also in my car with me at the time (!!!) though she was asleep, and of course it could've been a lot worse, and ultimately I acknowledge that it is very fortunate that we hit only each other and didn't involve any other vehicles. But I told S that I hope he enjoys the way his car looks now b/c he is going to be driving it like that from now on b/c I do NOT have any $ to get it fixed. MY car, however, is definitely getting fixed, oh yessiree, Bob!!! And as it is now I'm going to have to come out of pocket for a nice big deductible with my insurance co. as well as covering my portion of a rental car for however many days it's going to take to fix my car. Money which I did NOT plan on spending on stupid driving mistakes. And in fact, I told S that part of the deductible was going to have to come out of his car fund account, so he gets to go down to the credit union next week and make a nice, fat withdrawal.

The cars were able to be driven home, and I drove my car to Job #2 today. The tire seems to be fine, and the door opens and shuts, the car just looks like total crunched-in SHIT where S swiped me. S, whose car also looks like crunched-in crap, says his car's damage is rubbing against the tire a little, so he can't drive it too much. I told him to get on the horn with his POS mom and get the $ from her if he wants it fixed, so he did and she has apparently agreed to pay for it. Good for S and his car.

So last night we were depressed (both of us) and TOTALLY pissed (me). On the plus side, the crash did wake the baby up but then she almost immediately went back to sleep so all this drama seems to have totally escaped her. Also, I told S I never, ever want to hear his cracks about women drivers ever again for the rest of our lives. Finally, I told him he can just forget about the massage I told him he could get and also about getting a bicycle for the baby. No more movies, no more DVD's, no more eating at La Mad., no more luxury items at all until we get all this mess straightened out and paid for. And he has agreed to everything I've said.

So if I get this p/t job that I interviewed for on Thursday then things might get and feel a little better. They offered me the job on the spot and said I was the most "personable" librarian they'd ever met. It sounds like an exciting opportunity for me too, in that I will be totally in charge of a small but growing library. So they asked me to let them know what it would "take" to bring me on board. I went home and discussed it with S, and on Friday I sent them an email with my schedule proposal and hourly salary requirements. I went up more than $3 from what they offered as an hourly wage so we'll see what they come back with. As usual, there's some pros and cons to the whole situation. For me, what it will boil down to is if they can offer me more $ than I'm earning here at Job #2. So we'll see! I'm worth it!

Today S is at home with the baby. They are not doing much b/c S's car is not very drivable, and also they don't have any $ to do anything. I told S to take her swimming but he said he was too depressed. I said to join the club, that I already had my crying fit last night while they were downstairs playing--and today I'm at work all day long!!! The TV guy came to look at the big tv today and was unable to fix it, so he said they'll have to cart it off to the shop next week. More inconvenience. Great.

Health/Stress Note: My facial twitch is still ongoing and my heavy sighing has increased in frequency and is occurring hourly now, it seems. Last week was a doozy at Job #1 as I was busier than I've been in a long time, hence, minimal blog posts were done.

I'm just pissed and upset and depressed. About the only thing that is getting me through the day is the group hug I got from my 2 friends here at Job #2.