I need the appraiser to give my house a market value of $10,000 more than it is currently/temporarily worth on the tax rolls in order for my refinance to come through at the best possible outcome!!! That shouldn't be too much to ask, I don't think; after all, the place was at that value when I bought it 4 years ago, plus Janie and I made all these wonderful improvements on the place, PLUS he measured wall to wall today and said that I have almost 200 more sq. ft. than I (and the tax office) thought! Come ON, man!
Ok, so why was I sobbing and having a crying binge on Weds. night? Well, basically Aaron disrespected me and insulted my honor as a bass player at rehearsal in front of Sundance, Sun's wife, our drummer, even Aaron's girlfriend who was there, and for absolutely no good reason. He was frustrated at other things but took it out on me. Why? Because he's known me for 12 yrs and thinks he can talk to me that way? Because in J2's opinion he's a womanizer/male chauvinist? Because he's a total asshole and a big fuckin' meany? All of the above? I was SO PISSED, but I didn't say anything until I had to leave to go to rehearsal at Leo's, and Aaron and I were alone and he was walking me to my car. Then I told Aaron I didn't need his attitude or his shit and he argued back with me and insulted me some more and I honestly just couldn't believe it. I was really angry with him and as I was about to drive away he all of a sudden opened my car door and said not to be mad at him. I said I was mad at him, but that maybe I'll get over it.
As I drove off I called Stefano to tell him what had happened and then I just started crying. Aaron committed a mortal sin with me, as one of my Absolute 100% Deal Breakers is to NEVER DISRESPECT ME IN FRONT OF OTHER PEOPLE. I divorced my husband for doing that to me! I broke up w/DA for doing that to me! If you got a problem with me then by all means, bring it to me, let's put it on the table and discuss--but NOT in front of others. Aaron said so many shitty things to me like I "don't know the songs" and "haven't done my homework" b/c I missed 2-3 notes in the end of this ONE song we were working on. We had just done 4 other Sundance songs and I had my charts and notes with me and the songs were fine. And Aaron and Sun were messing up left and right too--Sun on his own songs! But b/c I missed a couple of notes at the END of this one song, Aaron took off his guitar and said to me and Sun as Sun started to show me those last notes, "Y'all learn the song and let me know when you got it." Meaning, Adela learn the song and let me know when Adela has it. Never mind all my hours and hours spent on my charts, bass transcriptions, and notebook full of notes or my success on the other songs--he was basically saying I hadn't done SHIT.
(Not to mention that nobody had even bothered to tell me until that day about this mid-week rehearsal occurring on the same night I always have rehearsal with Leo but that I'd still managed to move mountains in order to be there--leaving work early, telling my mom she would now have to get a cab ride from her doctor's appt. [the cab only took her 1 mile to meet my stepdad so it was no big deal but still!], having Stefano go to my house to pick up Henry the 5-string bass and meet me in the parking lot of a bank on the freeway to make the exchange, and pushing back Leo's rehearsal by a 1/2 hour so I could have a good solid 2 1/2 hours of rehearsal w/Aaron and Sun [and BTW Sun didn't even show up until 6pm, while I'd been waiting at Aaron's since 5pm!!!])
I was just so hurt b/c it was so unfair. It was wrong, unwarranted, mean, and 100% completely unfair. Stefano listened to me sobbing and sobbing and said that music is supposed to be fun, not like this. I said maybe I should just get through the 2 gigs coming up with Sundance and Aaron and be done with them. Stefano said if it were him he'd be done with them now! After I spoke to Stefano I spoke with Phillipo and just kept crying. Then I got to Leo's, still crying, and George and he had to hug me and listen to what happened too. They both said FUCK AARON and that the Sundance project doesn't deserve me. They also said if it were them they'd be gone now too. George even said not to even give them the courtesy of an official resignation, just to disappear on them.
That night when I got home late I sent Aaron a text message: "You're right, I'm not anywhere near the level of musical genius that you are so go ahead and get JT [the drug addict/untrustworthy bassist in another of Aaron's bands that Aaron threatened to give the Sundance gig to] to play with you and Sundance. I'll get your bass back to you Saturday. Thanks anyway for the opportunity." And I sent Sundance a facebook msg b/c I didn't have his # and it was a very nice message, saying that I have really enjoyed playing with him, learning his songs, getting to know him and his wife, that I am still a fan of his, that Aaron confirms JT can pick up where I left off which I believe, thanked him for the wonderful opportunity, and that my best wishes and prayers go to him for his musical career. Then I felt SO RELIEVED. Relieved that now my already-practically extinct spare time can go back to reading books, watching movies, chilling out at my house, spending more time with Stefano/my friends/family, etc. INSTEAD of eating, drinking, and breathing Sundance's music so that I could learn it as fast as humanly possible for these upcoming gigs.
And then... yesterday morning the shit hit the fan as they say, and yes, I actually was surprised at that too. Sundance sent me a msg. back saying to please give him my # so he can call me and talk to me. He said he thought I was doing great and didn't understand what was going on. His wife called me and had a long talk with me and said how they also were appalled that Aaron had been talking down to me like that in front of everyone but they weren't sure how to intervene. She said that I had been doing just FINE on everything, and noted that Aaron was messing up too. She said Sundance loves working with me, they both really like me and my great attitude, and she begged me to reconsider. She couldn't believe I was still willing to continue working after Aaron was treating me like that, that if it had been her the bitch would've come out right then and there. I said that I did have words with Aaron outside, but that I was just trying to be professional and continue working before I had to leave. But I also told her that I have to leave the project b/c I can't work w/Aaron. I said that the way he talked to me is 100% unacceptable and I won't have that in my life and I can't have that in my life. At all. I have too many people that want me to play in their bands--I get asked every other week to consider playing in other people's projects--people who would NOT treat me like shit the way Aaron did. She begged me again to just think about it, b/c they want me for the project, not this drug addict JT guy. I reiterated that Aaron said JT can do it and I have to believe him.
Then the text messages from Aaron started. My eyes were all puffy from my crying binge, my head hurt, my chest was tight, and I was trying to get over it all but Aaron's text messages were making it impossible for me to move on and recover. He sent message after message about how sorry he was, how I'm the right "man" for the project, not JT, how I'm a phenomenal bass player and JT doesn't have my blues/country roots, how JT was never actually a consideration after all, how he hoped I would let him crawl around on his knees in dog shit begging my forgiveness, how he was stupid and wrong to say all that crap to me, how much he loves me as a friend and loves being onstage with me, how wonderful of a person I am, how much he respects me, how sad he'll be if we can't put this behind us, please call him so we can talk, blah blah blah blah BLAH!!! I was tempted to turn off my phone just to get some peace. It all just made my chest tighter and my head keep hurting (and I can't take any Ibuprofin or anything like that b/c I'm donating platelets on Sat. for a retired Reserve deputy's wife who is in the cancer hospital and you can't take stuff like that w/in 48 hours of donating). I sent Aaron back a few choice texts saying I had nothing to say to him, so where/when would he like his bass returned?
SC and I were Yahoo chatting about this too and he asked was I just being sensitive. Seriously, I have absolutely no time to spare on anyone who is going to be mean and shitty to me for no reason. If there's one thing I would have a genie give me a wish on, it would be MORE TIME. More hours in the day, more days in the week. I cannot give one second of my precious time to someone like Aaron or allow them to be in my life. It's MY life, after all!!! And as far as reconsidering my resignation, well the whole project is ruined for me now isn't it? It's not fair to expect me to be able to come back to rehearsal and NOT be nervous about any more wrong notes or NOT be fearful that Aaron will snap again and give me attitude or say something shitty again.
I was feeling better finally last night by the time Stefano picked me up from work so we could go see the free Cyril Neville concert. Oh lord, did we have fun!!!!!!!!!! Philipo also joined us, and of course we ran into so many other friends/musicians we knew! We danced, drank (Stefano and I had Crown/Coke/ice with us), I even led a conga line briefly! The music was killer and it was just the best time. Then we went to have a drink at our fave blues club and unfortunately there was an ugly incident there involving yet another stupid guitarist with a big mouth that I had to put in his place--but he deserved it.
Basically this guitarist, a friend of all of ours--who is also around 8-9 yrs younger than me BTW!--had told Leo last week that The Leo Trio hasn't paid our dues so we won't make it past the 1st round of the IBC. Oh my God. Appalling!!! When Leo told me this I went to my car the next day and yanked off this guitarist's bumper sticker that I was nice enough to be driving around with and de-liked his Facebook page! So idiot was at the bar last night and I made sure to ignore him when he said hi to Stefano. Perplexed, a few minutes later he had the nerve to come over to my table where I was sitting w/Stefano and say that he just wanted to say hi to me. I glared at him and didn't say anything; he looked at Stefano, who shrugged, so idiot slunk away and went outside w/his tail between his legs. SERIOUSLY?! You're gonna talk shit about me and then act all buddy buddy with me??? I won't tolerate fakeness or hypocrisy either! It's true that he also caught me at a time when I am in no mood to tolerate any crap from anyone.
I was just so hurt b/c it was so unfair. It was wrong, unwarranted, mean, and 100% completely unfair. Stefano listened to me sobbing and sobbing and said that music is supposed to be fun, not like this. I said maybe I should just get through the 2 gigs coming up with Sundance and Aaron and be done with them. Stefano said if it were him he'd be done with them now! After I spoke to Stefano I spoke with Phillipo and just kept crying. Then I got to Leo's, still crying, and George and he had to hug me and listen to what happened too. They both said FUCK AARON and that the Sundance project doesn't deserve me. They also said if it were them they'd be gone now too. George even said not to even give them the courtesy of an official resignation, just to disappear on them.
That night when I got home late I sent Aaron a text message: "You're right, I'm not anywhere near the level of musical genius that you are so go ahead and get JT [the drug addict/untrustworthy bassist in another of Aaron's bands that Aaron threatened to give the Sundance gig to] to play with you and Sundance. I'll get your bass back to you Saturday. Thanks anyway for the opportunity." And I sent Sundance a facebook msg b/c I didn't have his # and it was a very nice message, saying that I have really enjoyed playing with him, learning his songs, getting to know him and his wife, that I am still a fan of his, that Aaron confirms JT can pick up where I left off which I believe, thanked him for the wonderful opportunity, and that my best wishes and prayers go to him for his musical career. Then I felt SO RELIEVED. Relieved that now my already-practically extinct spare time can go back to reading books, watching movies, chilling out at my house, spending more time with Stefano/my friends/family, etc. INSTEAD of eating, drinking, and breathing Sundance's music so that I could learn it as fast as humanly possible for these upcoming gigs.
And then... yesterday morning the shit hit the fan as they say, and yes, I actually was surprised at that too. Sundance sent me a msg. back saying to please give him my # so he can call me and talk to me. He said he thought I was doing great and didn't understand what was going on. His wife called me and had a long talk with me and said how they also were appalled that Aaron had been talking down to me like that in front of everyone but they weren't sure how to intervene. She said that I had been doing just FINE on everything, and noted that Aaron was messing up too. She said Sundance loves working with me, they both really like me and my great attitude, and she begged me to reconsider. She couldn't believe I was still willing to continue working after Aaron was treating me like that, that if it had been her the bitch would've come out right then and there. I said that I did have words with Aaron outside, but that I was just trying to be professional and continue working before I had to leave. But I also told her that I have to leave the project b/c I can't work w/Aaron. I said that the way he talked to me is 100% unacceptable and I won't have that in my life and I can't have that in my life. At all. I have too many people that want me to play in their bands--I get asked every other week to consider playing in other people's projects--people who would NOT treat me like shit the way Aaron did. She begged me again to just think about it, b/c they want me for the project, not this drug addict JT guy. I reiterated that Aaron said JT can do it and I have to believe him.
Then the text messages from Aaron started. My eyes were all puffy from my crying binge, my head hurt, my chest was tight, and I was trying to get over it all but Aaron's text messages were making it impossible for me to move on and recover. He sent message after message about how sorry he was, how I'm the right "man" for the project, not JT, how I'm a phenomenal bass player and JT doesn't have my blues/country roots, how JT was never actually a consideration after all, how he hoped I would let him crawl around on his knees in dog shit begging my forgiveness, how he was stupid and wrong to say all that crap to me, how much he loves me as a friend and loves being onstage with me, how wonderful of a person I am, how much he respects me, how sad he'll be if we can't put this behind us, please call him so we can talk, blah blah blah blah BLAH!!! I was tempted to turn off my phone just to get some peace. It all just made my chest tighter and my head keep hurting (and I can't take any Ibuprofin or anything like that b/c I'm donating platelets on Sat. for a retired Reserve deputy's wife who is in the cancer hospital and you can't take stuff like that w/in 48 hours of donating). I sent Aaron back a few choice texts saying I had nothing to say to him, so where/when would he like his bass returned?
SC and I were Yahoo chatting about this too and he asked was I just being sensitive. Seriously, I have absolutely no time to spare on anyone who is going to be mean and shitty to me for no reason. If there's one thing I would have a genie give me a wish on, it would be MORE TIME. More hours in the day, more days in the week. I cannot give one second of my precious time to someone like Aaron or allow them to be in my life. It's MY life, after all!!! And as far as reconsidering my resignation, well the whole project is ruined for me now isn't it? It's not fair to expect me to be able to come back to rehearsal and NOT be nervous about any more wrong notes or NOT be fearful that Aaron will snap again and give me attitude or say something shitty again.
I was feeling better finally last night by the time Stefano picked me up from work so we could go see the free Cyril Neville concert. Oh lord, did we have fun!!!!!!!!!! Philipo also joined us, and of course we ran into so many other friends/musicians we knew! We danced, drank (Stefano and I had Crown/Coke/ice with us), I even led a conga line briefly! The music was killer and it was just the best time. Then we went to have a drink at our fave blues club and unfortunately there was an ugly incident there involving yet another stupid guitarist with a big mouth that I had to put in his place--but he deserved it.
Basically this guitarist, a friend of all of ours--who is also around 8-9 yrs younger than me BTW!--had told Leo last week that The Leo Trio hasn't paid our dues so we won't make it past the 1st round of the IBC. Oh my God. Appalling!!! When Leo told me this I went to my car the next day and yanked off this guitarist's bumper sticker that I was nice enough to be driving around with and de-liked his Facebook page! So idiot was at the bar last night and I made sure to ignore him when he said hi to Stefano. Perplexed, a few minutes later he had the nerve to come over to my table where I was sitting w/Stefano and say that he just wanted to say hi to me. I glared at him and didn't say anything; he looked at Stefano, who shrugged, so idiot slunk away and went outside w/his tail between his legs. SERIOUSLY?! You're gonna talk shit about me and then act all buddy buddy with me??? I won't tolerate fakeness or hypocrisy either! It's true that he also caught me at a time when I am in no mood to tolerate any crap from anyone.
Idiot stayed outside while we were there, even when the band started up. Philipo showed up a few min. later and confirmed he was outside and I made sure to tell Philipo and another guitarist friend of ours what a "big fucking mouth" idiot guitarist has. (I heard a great line from the new "Wall Street" sequel that just came out: "You quit telling lies about me, and I'll quit telling the truth about you!") After a couple drinks and lots of dancing, Stefano and I headed home and a text message came through on my phone: it was Leo! Leo said that he and idiot have just "set things straight so give him a wink and let's move on." I texted back NO! Then I called Leo, first singing the opening lines of "You are the Sunshine of My Life" to him (I was a little tipsy by then), then asking why in the world would idiot call LEO after being dissed by me?!? Would it be because, oh I don't know, perhaps he added 2+2, figured out he was BUSTED by me, and thereby proved that a phone call to Leo means he deserves a big fucking "Guilty!" sign around his neck???
Ok so anyway. Big weekend ahead! Tonight we're going to see some live music w/my cousin to celebrate her recent B.A. in nursing. Tomorrow I'm donating the platelets at 10:30 am and they say it should take about an hour and a half. I'm a little nervous, never having done this before, but I'll eat a good breakfast and I should be ok. After that is our final rehearsal before the IBC on Sunday which is gonna be HUGE. (To the IBC I'm wearing an incredibly short black dress w/sequins on the top. It's like 1960's short! I'm gonna wear some black bike shorts underneath and fold 'em up just in case, I mean I want to be respectful and not slutty towards this crowd.) After rehearsal I'm gwine go down to the gun range for one final practice session before I qualify next Saturday; right after that my dad is having a pre-housewarming party party. Stefano has a gig that night way far away and I am sooooooooooooooooo looking forward to having some down time at my house, by myself, with my books and DVR. Oh mannnnnnnnnnnn..........
Sunday I think I'd like to go for an early morning run to clear my head and get ready for the competition. We have to be there at 1:30 to draw straws to determine the order of the 5 bands--2 bands of which are close personal friends of mine. We're just gonna have fun and do our best to melt people's faces off with our high voltage blues!
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